Robbie Williams

23.09.2014 Brisbane Entertainment Centre

Robbie Williams Swings Both Ways! I gasped as I read the headline, but then again weren’t we all kind of expecting it? Kind of like when I poke my cat’s stomach repeatedly and then he turns on me and attacks and I act really shocked and hurt. Okay so that only really applies to cat slaves owners but you get the gist. So Williams is a swinger hey? Nope, apparently not – it’s the title of his second swing cover album and current world tour.

As my lady date Elouise and I make our way out to the Entertainment Centre for the second night of Mr Williams Brisbane show, we discuss what type of crowd it would be. Old crooners who’d come out for a tune and a jive? Middle aged ladies who still got hot and bothered by Robbie? Young fans that have grown up with his tunes when they were discovering their music identity in the early noughties? Clearly, as two young women in their twenties, we were here for a reminiscent tune and a jive.

As we passed through the venue gate it immediately became apparent what stereotype the majority of the crowd fit tonight…the rumbos were flowing, rhinestones were dazzling and sing alongs had ensued as I was enclosed in a cloud of Britney’s latest fragrance – it was my arch nemesis, suburban middle-aged women! I headed straight to the bar, fighting tooth and fake encrusted nails for a spot in line.

Feeling more at ease with a belly full of beer, we made our way to the ‘mosh’ just in time for the star act to make his elegant entrance. El is surprised at how classy his entrance is, considering last time he was in Brisbane (2006) Williams allegedly fondled three lucky ladies and stuck his tongue down their throats. Before she could finish her sentence though, he announces, “My name is Robert Peter Williams and tonight your arse is mine!” whilst pointing to his derrière and licking his finger. I tell her it’s probably still a notch above last time as he’s wearing a coat and tails.

His opening number is an original, Shine my Shoes, which is good, but I am more impressed by the stage setup – luxurious velvet curtain, international dancers, a big, big band (including Guy Chambers on keys) and sassy backup singers with questionable weaves.  As RW works through a catalogue of classic swing hits, such as Puttin’ on the Ritz, Ain’t that a Kick in the Head, Mr Bojangles, That’s Amore and a crowd pleasing swing version of Love Supreme, he does so with a very big touch of his infamous comedic flair, which I think is hilariously on point and very well timed. Turns out he is reading from an auto cue, but he still manages to impress with a perfect balance of crude comedy and wit.

As though he is beckoning for me to hit the stage, Williams brings out a barbershop quartet and they dive into the greatest acoustic rendition of Ignition Remix (by Mr R Kelly) since my great singing debut at Casablanca’s in 09. This isn’t the only gimmick of the night, which includes a children’s choir, a duet with Daddyo Williams, a tribute to The Jungle Book with I Wanna Walk Like You (yes the entire ensemble were dressed as monkeys) and a performance of No One Likes a Fat Popstar from a fat suit that ‘forced his balls back inside him’ but was oh so worth it.

After a short intermission (or what I like to call a rumbo refill recess) the second half opens and takes us out to sea with the fifties inspired Soda Pop before we Hit the Road with Jack. He gives the crowd a much-needed awakening (and got me jumping and jiving) with SHOUT and somehow manages to sign a woman’s buttocks without turning the night into a tacky affair. How does he do it? It must be that special brand of Northern England cheek and charm.

A few more favourites and Mr Williams launches into the final set of the night with a sweet medley of old hits and big band classic, including New York New York, My Way, Rock DJ, Millennium, and Come Undone.He takes a final bow, but hesitates before he leaves. He has the audience eating out of the palm of his hand and isn’t about to walk away from that. Williams announces ‘we’ve never tried this before, so hopefully it works’ before rolling into a complete crowd pleaser and perfect ode to Creedence and Ike & Tina with Proud Mary.

 It’s not often you’ll see me enthusiastically dancing amongst a massive crowd without having consumed a mass amount of alcohol, but I could feel the Robbie flowin’ through my veins and I just had to swing – albeit a bit to much as I knocked two drinks over and elbowed a gentleman in the ribs in the process. You know what they say though, swing when you’re winning right? Okay, so apparently no one ever says that, but I thought it would be a really humorous and ironic way to end the article…

Leila Amirparviz