GI Joe: Retaliation
Starring: Dwayne Johnson, Adrienne Palicki, D.J. Cotrona, Johnathon Pryce, Channing Tatum
Directed By: John M. Chu
Reviewed by Danielle Muir
[rating: 2.5/5]
After an almost year-long delay GI Joe: Retaliation has reached our screens in a cavalcade of world domination, ridiculous action sequences and not-altogether-necessary-but-still-flashy 3D. Following an attack ordered by a phoney President, Brawny Joe, pretty Joe and average Joe are forced to go covert, scampering to figure out the conspiracy behind who wiped out their platoon. Meanwhile in underground Germany, Storm Shadow moonlighting as Snake Eyes busts Cobra Commander out of his watery prison – and the battle for planet Earth commences.
As you can see there’s a few points from the first film (Rise of the Cobra) that you need to familiarise yourself with in order to prevent the odd head-scratch. For the uninitiated here’s enough to get you through –know that Storm Shadow (dressed in white) was on the bad side, Snake Eyes (dressed in black) is a hero, Zartan shape-shifted into el presidente at the end and no, Channing Tatum is not a major character as the poster would imply.
The rest of the plot’s not that difficult to follow, it is essentially Zartan and his crew of action-combat experts carrying out their diabolical plan to take over the world – the means of which is pretty cool in a I-wonder-if-that-would-really-work case but comes fairly unexpectedly and randomly towards the conclusion. The three Joe’s spared from the opening’s explosive slaughter retreat to various allies planted across the country in order to clear their names and uncover the truth. There’s not more to it than that, folks.
The element that differentiates GI: Joe Retaliation from other such generic action films is the element of martial arts that forms certain character’s backgrounds – and also the different options for fight scenes this offers. Whilst a little too obvious CGI heavy, the scene in which Snake Eyes and Jinx take on the evil ninjas swinging between the mountains of the Himalayas is certainly an exhilarating ride, and is a standout within a storyline littered with immense gunfire.
The three leads are a little cringe worthy but they’re playing characters based on the persona of All-American tough-talking action figures – so I guess that can’t be helped. Johnson is an obvious choice for muscle-bound leader Roadblock, and Cotrona doesn’t really get much of a look-in as Flint – a character shoved in there to make them a trio. But it’s Palicki who’s particularly irksome, shouting orders and marching around but just too gorgeous for you to believe she could actually kick anyone into the ground. Especially when she strips down to her smalls in order to lure a politician into their trap. Go team.
Apart from the martial arts element you can’t help but think ‘hey, haven’t I seen this movie before…’ because you have. It’s nice that they’ve spared a few thoughts on the technological plan for world domination, and also that they had the balls to blow up London (see trailer) but there’s not much originality to be found here.
